Deeper Into the Light
by sbender333
Summary: UPDATE. Examines relationships between the Chris and his family, primarily Piper and Leo, after the learning of Chris' parentage. Parellels the show.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  PG-13**

**Summary:  Ficlet involving the sisters, Chris, and Leo.  **

**Spoilers:  "****Hyde****School****Reunion****"**

~*~****

            "Don't go!" Chris screamed, his arm extending out to the Whitelighter in mid-orb.  He looked oddly like a child, desperate.

            "I have to get back to the Elders," Leo said simply, as if that summed it all up.  He turned to Piper, who clutched baby Wyatt.  She remained erect, holding Leo's gaze.  Leo quickly diverted his eyes and glanced around the room, seeming to scrounge for support.  Stationed at the rear of the nursery, Phoebe and Paige stood, solemnly looking back at him.  "I have to go…" he begged them desperately.  Without a motion or a word they conveyed their displeasure at his situation, his decision.  Realizing he wouldn't receive their support, or even their compassion, he thought back to the words of Gideon--his mentor:  '_You__ can't justify staying behind any longer, not with this, not anymore. It's time to fully accept your Calling, one that necessarily transcends the sings of the flesh, family, even fatherhood. One that requires you to cut the ties that bind, for everyone's sake.'_

            And immediately, the decision was made.  "It has to be this way.  You know I don't have a choice," he stated, relaying his last words to Piper.  She grasped her son tightly and looked away with what Leo hoped, or rather prayed was understanding.

            "_No_, it _doesn't_ have to be this way.  Don't abandon me again-" Chris contradicted, delaying his orb, yet again.

            "'_Again_!'  What do you mean 'again'?  How can I have abandoned you?"  Then realization hit.  "This isn't the future, Chris.  Okay?!  I have done nothing to you yet."

            "That's just it:  You've done _nothing_."  Chris retorted quietly, prevailing to spit the last word out with venom.

            "Look, I'm not abandoning you-"

            "Yes, you are, and you will.  Why don't you make up for your past mistakes and stay.  Help me now."

            "You don't understand, Chris!  I haven't done any of this.  Your past is my future."

            "Well, then, prevent what happens in your future.  You left me, or leave me, if you prefer.  Don't leave me now."  Chris reiterated his ideas once again.  "If that can't convince you, stay for him, your firstborn."  Chris gestured toward Wyatt, who lay in his mother's arms.  "He needs you more than the Elders."  At Leo's look, he held up his hand and continued, "Who are you kidding, saying that you can be just as helpful to him by not being here?  They are not after you; they are after Wyatt.  I've been there.  Just _listen_ to me."

            At this, Leo stopped.  Who was right:  Gideon, who he had trusted all his life, or his future son, who he had just recently learned of?  He looked at his child, Wyatt, and then at Piper.  He didn't want to leave them; he truly did want to be with them, with all his heart.  But it was his duty as an Elder…

            Chris scrutinized his father's countenance.  He had to convince him to remain at home, somehow.  Not just to protect Wyatt at the present, but to be a father to the child in the future.  In his life, Leo had been home for neither Wyatt--when it mattered--nor Chris.  That had aided in Wyatt's turning.  Wyatt needed someone else in that first year of his life.  Piper had been great as their mother, but if there had been someone else things might have been different….  Realizing he had checked out for a minute, Chris focused again on Leo.  He needed something else, for it seemed he was losing this battle.  Knowing it would strike a chord, he put forth is final statement:  "You're walking out on your children, Leo.  If you couldn't handle having kids, you should have been more careful.  You screwed up as a father in my past, don't let it happen in your future."

            "Chris…" Piper toned warningly, her peace-maker personality shone out, pushing her to intervene.

            "No, Piper, he's right.  I haven't been here for you."  Leo, closing his eyes, rubbed his temples with his forefingers.  "I'll just stay for a while, and then I'll decide what to do," he said mostly to himself than anyone else.  Opening them up, his eyes once again fell on his family.  "I've missed you so much.  Both of you." He just wanted to be with them.  He walked towards his family and embraced his lover and his child.  His head fell to Piper's shoulder and he sobbed, "I'm sorry" as she stroked his hair gently.  Feeling his son tenderly touch his face, Leo's sobs augmented.

            Chris watched the family in their pain, heart-broken.  'The family,' he reflected.  'The family of three.  I should be a part of it.'  He felt a hand on his arm and heard his aunt's voice.

            "Hey, Chris, let's go," Paige said gently, as they began to orb into the kitchen.

~*~

            The two sisters and their nephew sat at the table, holding one of their apparently common talks, as Chris claimed occurred in the future.

  
            "He knows I'm his son, right?" Chris asked, sarcasm dripping in his voice.

            "Chris…" Phoebe said, sounding like her older sister.  "He hasn't forgotten you."

            "Well, you know, that is what it does seem like," Chris responded spitefully, his voice raising and octave.  "You had to have seen him up there.  He didn't respond to me, just…Wyatt."

            "Aw, is Chris feeling a little sibling rivalry?  Fighting for his father's affection," Paige crooned, trying to lighten the mood, but failing miserably.

            "I'm serious." Chris replied, irritated.

            "Sorry," Paige apologized.  Switching back to Chris' desired conversational topic, she stated in Leo's defense, "He just learned that he was your father.  Give him some time."

            "Yeah, I guess.  I just feel like he owes me for-"  He stopped suddenly, realizing he was on the verge of revealing something he probably shouldn't.  "He owes me for the time he wasn't there and should have been," he finished vaguely.  "When I go back I won't have him, so I guess I just want to make the most of all the time I have.  Like what Grandpa said about mom," Chris answered, allowing his heart to appear little more visibly on his sleeve.  He had turned away from his stone, unfeeling self and opened up much more after his meeting with his beloved grandfather.

            "I understand, Chris.  Of course.  Just give him a little time."  Phoebe replied.

            "What about his Elder duties.  He can't just turn away from that.  You know Gideon wanted him to be a full-time Elder," Paige prodded.

            "Look, as I told you, being an Elder isn't as important as being here, with his family.  I mean, you guys need your Whitelighter back after I'm gone.  And he can do so much more with you guys here.  Just trust me, I know."  Chris answered, becoming agitated once again.

            "Yeah, I do miss him." Paige reminisced. Then glancing at Chris, "But, of course, you've been great, Chris.  But you know…Leo knows us," she finished lamely.

            "Yeah…right," Chris replied, but it did get a smile out of him.  A moment of silence proceeded, prodding Phoebe to question Chris about a topic concerning her.

            "So, Chris…" Phoebe started.

            "Yeah…?"

            "What is with Leo in your future?  Why isn't he around?  Is he dead?"  Phoebe pressed.

            Chris sighed, "First of all, it's my past, your future.  And secondly, I can't tell you.  You already know too much about Mom."  His voice softened at the last word.

            Attempting once again to lighten the mood, Paige commented, "Giving your father the 'being careful' speech up there was pretty funny."

            "Yeah," Chris answered, smiling slightly.  "I just wanted to hit a nerve. Do whatever I had to do."

            They continued to sit in silence for several minutes, musing over their pasts, presents, and futures.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  R**

**Summary:  Ficlet involving the sisters, Chris, and Leo.  **

**Spoilers:  "****Hyde****School****Reunion****"**

**Author's Notes:  This one got bumped up to R because of the scene toward the middle.  It's a little graphic, but not terribly.  So if you're not into that sort of thing just skip over it.  Anyway, I do thank you for the reviews.  And please continue leaving them.           **

~*~

            Lying on the bed, Leo stared at his son, sleeping blissfully in his crib.  Piper, her head on his chest, lay in Leo's arms.  Her eyes, too, were open, but, lost in her thoughts, she was not aware of her surroundings, solely Leo's body.  One hand of his was wrapped around her shoulders, holding her tightly, the other lay gently on Piper's stomach.

            "I wish you told me about Chris sooner," Leo said softly, breaking the serenity.

            Piper scoffed.  "Yeah and when exactly could I have mentioned it to you?"  Hmm?  While you were off taking care of important matters with the Elders?  Well, then again I guess, maybe, I could have told you as you were spending time with the son you already have, or-"

            "Okay, you're right.  I'm sorry." Leo interjected diffidently, in time to stop the tirade.  He shifted uncomfortably, under Piper's weight, or rather the guilt settling in his chest.

            Hearing the anguish in Leo's voice, Piper replied, "No, I'm sorry…It wasn't your choice.  And even if it had been your decision, I probably didn't make it too difficult for you…how I acted that past year after Wyatt was born."

            "No, no, Piper.  That's not true.  You know that's not true."  He lowered his head and tentatively kissed her head.  Feeling her tears dampen his shirt, he pulled her closer to himself.  He removed his hand from her stomach and began to stroke her cheek, wiping away the tears.  "I had always loved you."  Then tenderly, repeating the words of their fateful night he says, "I never stopped loving you…"

~*~

_            "I never stopped loving you, you know," he released, the dam of emotions breaking.  Tears streaming down her face, Piper kissed him, holding his face in her hands.  Remember those times when she had hid behind Wyatt's need of a father, refusing to put forth her need as well, she accepted that she needed him more than she had ever cared to admit._

_            She broke away from his lips, and looked into his eyes.  They reflected the passion, yet the sadness that she felt.  Despite their parted lips, the connection was not broken.  Their eyes drew them together, leading them into a more passionate, almost frantic kiss._

_            His hands travel under her shirt and his fingers gently gyrated on her stomach.  He broke their kiss and his lips began to travel down her neck.  They rested at her pulse point, where he sucked hungrily making her gasp and then moan into his hair.  She eventually pushed him back, desiring more.  Looking into his eyes she tacitly expressed her want, desperation, need._

_            "Please Leo…"_

_            At this he led her into the door opening up to the alley.  He began to unbutton her blouse, trying without much success to tear any, for his fingers were shaking.  Managing to pull it off, he threw it to the ground.  He wrapped his arms around her and started on his next task.  Unhooking her bra, he caressed her sensitive flesh, eliciting a moan out her.  Shuddering, she put her hands on her shoulders for balance as he pulled of her remaining bottom.  She kicked of her shoes and stepped out of her pants._

_            Anxious, Piper frantically pulled off her lover's clothes, refusing to take the care that Leo had.  She added his clothes to the heap and buried her head into Leo's chest, breathing in his unforgotten scent._

_            "God, Leo, I need you.  I need you so much; I've needed you for so long."_

_            Leo arranged their clothes into a makeshift bed.  He gently lowered Piper down as he lay on top of her.  He began lay kisses down her neck, her chest, her stomach.  He made his way back up, this time sucking on her hardened nipples.  Sighing, Piper grasped strands of his hair; her fingers massage his scalp.  He switched to other, applying equal attention to each._

_            "Leo, please.  Now," Piper begged again._

_            In response, he entered her.  Her arms wrapped around his neck and her legs wrapped around his waist.  A rhythm was set; she matched him thrust for thrust.  They made love with fervent passion, as if it they had never before.  Yet they made love, able to read each other, as if they had many times before._

_            Fingers intertwined, they called out their lover's name.  Piper, loud, the sound rattling off the walls of the empty building, unaware of the threat of the Darklighter.  Leo, whispering her name into her ear.  Satisfied, they collapsed onto one another._

~*~

            "I was wrong to leave you, Piper," Leo affirmed.

            "No, you weren't.  You didn't have a choice," Piper stated, her rational side deciding for her.  Contemplating her past words, however, she realized they had given to her a portal to her heart's desire—being with Leo.  But, she knew that Leo had heard the words, and it wasn't fair to him, for it was his responsibility, not his choice to be an Elder.  "Look, about what I said before…"

            "Piper…"

            "No, Leo.  Please let me finish."  She pushed herself off of Leo's chest and leaned against the pillows, sitting upright.  She continued, "About what I said… I just miss you."  She ended with nothing more, for it was a simple as that.  She knew of Leo's duties but she her heart still ached to be without him.

            "No, but everything you've said is true.  And everything Chris has said.  I haven't been here enough.  But, I just don't want to attract any danger…"  He hesitated, then, "and put you in harms way."

            "Leo! No!"  Piper said, irritated.  "We are the Power of Three.  We attract evil automatically.  Anything else you bring is nothing compared to what we've handled.  I mean we vanquished the Source _three times_.  We don't need you!"  Instantly, she realized her words.  "No, I don't mean that.  Of course we need you."  She touched his cheek.  "Just not like that.  Not away, to prevent attracting evil.  We need you here.  To heal us.  To boast our morale.  To be here for me…"

            Leo contemplated this in silence.  Nothing but the soft sighs of their sleeping son were heard.

            Eventually, he answered.  "You're right, you know.  Of course, you're right.  I don't know what kept me Up There.  Well, yes I do-Gideon.  I think he was just trying to protect the Elders, though.  But I should be here.  You don't even have a Whitelighter that can heal."

            "But how, Leo?  You can't; you have a job."

            "We've been through so much.  I mean our relationship.  We fell in love against the Elder's wishes.  We got married when the Elders said we couldn't.  And we conceived a child.  We can change the rules again.  Our love has survived all of this; it can stand up to much more.  I'm not only an Elder, but also a father.  And that should come first.  I need to be here for you.  And Wyatt and-" He gestured toward Piper's abdomen and then resumed, "he needs me too.  We have another son on the way.  I should be here for him …" He broke of there and gazed at her rounded belly.  "So that's really Chris."

            "Yep."

            "Oh."  Leo stated, and then sighed.

            "What's that supposed to mean?"  Piper, swatting Leo's arm, said in a tone of mock annoyance.  The smile playing at her lips told Leo to laugh it off.

            "Well, he is a bit…" Leo stopped unable to find a fitting word.

            "You just got to get to know him…."  She paused, musing, and then added, "You know that he calls me 'Mom.'"

            Leo smiled at this.  "You think…you think he'd call me 'Dad?'  I mean, I know that it'll be hard for me to undue leaving him.  Now and in the future.  I just want to make sure what he says about me won't happen.  I hope he forgives me."  Realizing that he seemed to be rambling, he concluded, "I know I have to be patient, but I just hope…"  A new set of emotions had been open toward Chris after Leo had learned of his parentage.

            "I'm sure.  Just get to know him," Piper supplied in response to his original question.

            "Well, maybe I should get to know this one," Leo said, eyeing Piper's stomach.  He lifted up her shirt and kissed her navel.  "Hi, Chris.  This is your father.  I just want you to know that I'll always be there for you."

            "Leo," Piper muttered, giggling.  "I meant…_Big_ Chris."

            "Yeah, I know.  I just-" He stopped mid-sentence to excitedly interject, "Did you feel that!?"  He was referring to the light kick against his hand.

            "Yes, of course I felt it, Leo."  She rolled her eyes not only at his ridiculous statement, but at his eagerness.

            Leo climbed up to Piper's level and gave her a deep kiss, grasping onto her hand.  Breaking away, but with fingers still locked, Leo rested his head next to Piper's.  He would relish these moments he had with her before having to facing his responsibilities.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  PG-13**

**Summary:  Leo disengages himself from the Elders.  Chris opens up to his aunts.  Leo and Piper bond over their two sons.    **

**Spoilers:  "****Spin****City****"**

**Author's Note:  Sorry for the lack of an update, but this one's a little longer.  Please continue to review.  Feedback is an author's inspiration.  And thanks to those who have already done so.**

~*~

            Chris sat on the couch, flipping mindlessly through the channels.  Nothing remotely satisfying was on.  Sighing in disdain, he got up, thrusting the remote control on the couch, and walked over to the window.  He stood, staring into the dark San Francisco street, illuminated solely by the pale light of the moon.

            Glancing down at his watch, he realized it was nearly midnight.  Phoebe had left, slightly unwillingly, several hours ago, for she had planned a date with another "Mitch."  She had put up a fight, claiming that she should stay here with the family.  Insisting that she didn't need to be here for him, Chris ordered her out to her date.  Apparently she had thought that Chris would do something drastic, while Leo was at home.  '_Give him time,'_ she had said.

            He had given him time.  Four hours to be specific.  Leo had been upstairs with his mother all night.  Maybe they were asleep.  Who knew?  They hadn't come down at all.  The more likely alternative was that Leo had gone bake Up There.  Broken his ties with his family once again.  Sighing, he shook his head and turned back to the television again.  Despite knowing that he had found nothing to watch then, and there would be nothing on just several minutes later, he picked up the remote and flicked the television on.  Flopping to the couch, he was consumed by his thoughts again.

            What was he still doing here alone?  Chris had kicked Phoebe out when he had learned of her date, which was soon after their kitchen table conversation, but Paige had lingered.  She and Chris had organized and restocked their supplies for potions.  Chris had claimed that they should be ready for any attack by having easy access to their potion needs.  The truth was that he really did not want to go back to P3 alone.  Paige had bought it, though.  However, Chris suspected she stayed no wanting to leave Chris in solitude at home.  Eventually, she had to leave; she realized that Piper had asked her to check on the club.  That was around eight.  And it still did not explain his being here alone for four hours.

            But, he was drawn to the Halliwell mansion.  He had grown up in it the first years of his dwarfed childhood, and it still seemed like home to him.  And now, Piper had offered him a room in the house.  At first he had declined, trying to separate himself from her, knowing what he had to go back to.  He had attempted to alienate himself from the family, but that hadn't lasted long.  His mother was desperately accepting him with open arms and he couldn't turn that down.  He had finally agreed to stay at the mansion when Leo had dropped in.  Well, more technically, Paige and Phoebe had called him, but he preferred to think of it as Leo's inopportune timing.  However, it wasn't really inopportune:  the family had needed him.  Chris had realized that and intervened as he thought of leaving again.

            Realizing that he was lingering on a sensitive subject, he pulled himself out of his sea of thoughts and satisfied himself with watching the ticker symbols flash by on CNN.

~*~

            Leo woke up to a soft crying noise.  He groggily pulled himself out of bed and glanced blearily at the deep red symbols on his alarm clock, or simply _Piper's_ alarm clock, as it was now.  The numbers glared back at him in the deep of the night, signaling that it was half past twelve.  He ambled over to his son's crib and pulled him out.

            "Shh, Wyatt.  Don't cry.  You'll wake your mother up and she needs her sleep.  Wyatt clasped Leo's neck and laid his head on his shoulder.  "Oh, you're getting to be sly, aren't you?  Want some attention; don't want to be alone, so you start to cry."  

            After kissing his son's cheek, he began to walk towards the bedroom door.  "Let's get us something to eat, okay?  A midnight snack perhaps."  Leo didn't get an answer, though, just the sound of Wyatt noisily sucking his thumb.

            Quietly closing the door, he stepped into the hallway.  The light from downstairs sharply contrasted the dark hall.  He made his way down, wondering who was still awake.

            His eyes stopped on Chris who had the television on but hardly seemed to be paying attention.  Leo didn't want to talk to him now.  Somehow, he felt as if he wasn't ready.  Not today; he felt emotionally worn.  'Maybe tomorrow,' he thought, pushing the encounter back a day.

            He turned to go back upstairs, but Chris suddenly rose.  

            "Oh.  It's you."

            'Damn it,' Leo thought, turning back around.  Now he would have to talk to him.  What was he supposed to say?  He clawed his mind for an answer, and coming up short, he simply said, "Chris."

            Chris held his father's gaze, emotions running through him.  But he wouldn't be the first to bring anything up.

            Leo shifted Wyatt on his hip at the uncomfortable silence.  Determining the set look on Chris' face, Leo realized that he would have to be the first to speak.  'You wanted Chris' acceptance…this is what you got,' he said to himself.  Walking into the family room, he sat down on the couch, Wyatt still in his arms.  Startled, Chris watched him incredulously.

            "Sit down," Leo commanded.  Chris sat.

            Instead of a conversation, a pregnant pause filled the room.

            Leo, finally began, "Chris, I know that I haven't…"  Leo stopped, stumped.  He opened his mouth as if to say something, but closed it again.  The expression Chris held told him he would get no help, so he simply said, "I know that I haven't treated you well, but-"

            Chris snorted and shifted his eyes away.

            "_But_," Leo began again, "I wanted to make that up to you."  Chris rolled his eyes, showing Leo that the statement simply wasn't enough.  At this, Leo continued, "Look, I didn't know that you were my son, and I know that doesn't excuse me of some things, but everything you did, I just didn't understand.  You said you were trying to save Wyatt, but it seemed like it was the exact opposite for a while.  I had no idea, Chris.  You've got to open up a little bit.  Tell me what's going on…Tell me what I've done."

            "Well, like I've said before, many times before:  'I can't tell you what happens, or it'll change too much,'" Chris stated scornfully.

            "Then cut me some slack!  I was just protecting Wyatt, my family.  At that time, I didn't know you were part of it too.  I just didn't know."  Leo said, entreating of understanding.

            Chris scoffed and then echoed, "'Protecting Wyatt.' Of course, your only son."

            "Do you listen!?  I didn't say that.  God!" Leo implored, irritated, pulling Chris' eyes back to him.  Then, sensing that Chris was beginning to block him off, Leo decided he should to some extent tell his son what he had told Piper.  "I know whatever I do in the future must be pretty horrible.  Obviously, I'm not there; maybe I divorced your mother, walked out on you guys, or was dead.  I have no idea.  And you don't have to tell me, but let me try to change the future.  You said you came to save Wyatt, well let something else come out if it too.  I'm supposed to be your father-"

            "Yeah, that's right, 'supposed to be,'" Chris tried to shoot back with acrimony, but falling short terribly.  His barrier was breaking.  He took his eyes away from Leo and stared at his hands.

            "That's what I'm trying to say, Chris," Leo laid out gently.  "Let me be a father to you.  The father you say you never had.  I can't help whatever I do in the past or future or whatever.  But I want to be here for you now.  I'm trying…"

            "Not this afternoon…you tried to leave and you knew about me…but then you stayed for Wyatt," Chris managed to choke out, weakly stringing together some of his thoughts.  He retaliated against Leo's words once again. But this time not out of malice, for he wanted to trust his father so much it ached.  Though he had been hurt in his past so deeply, he just couldn't let go.

            Taken aback by his words, Leo paused.  Chris was right; he was planning to leave and it seemed like he had stayed only for Wyatt.  He had been lost at that moment, wasn't thinking straight.  "Yeah…and I'm sorry.  And I can't even give you a decent reason.  I'm so sorry.  I screwed up.  I don't know what to say.  I mean all I can say is the truth.  I just felt so…confused, so stressed.  I don't know."  Leo paused, and then changed tracks. "You were right, though.  Not just about me staying here for Wyatt's sake, but for yours.  You've been through so much, more than I can possibly imagine.  And it's probably my fault," he added with a rueful laugh.  "But, I want to make up for it.  Let me be a father to you, the one I should have been," he repeated.

            Chris had his head in his hands, now.  He couldn't think of anything to say, and even if he could, he wouldn't have been able to get the words out.  Chris felt so open to his father, naked even, something that he wasn't used to.

            Leo waited for some sort of answer, anything.  But nothing came, except the shallow, ragged breaths of Chris and soft even breathing of Wyatt in his arms.  After a pause of what seemed like hours, Leo uncertainly put forth, "Son?"

            Hearing this, Chris' heart was pierced, and tears began to fall.  He felt a series of emotions he could quiet grasp.  The anger that had previously consumed him was being forced out.  Waves of relief yet doused in sadness came through.  His shoulders shook trying to stop his weeping, but he couldn't; he had kept too much locked up.

            Leo watched is son in his sorrow.  His paternal instincts drove him to clasp the young man's neck.  Pulling him towards his chest, Leo offered Chris some comfort he had been denied in his past.  As he listened to his son's sobs, he gently kneaded his neck and then placed a kiss his dark hair.  


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  PG-13**

**Summary:  Leo disengages himself from the Elders.  Chris opens up to his aunts.  Leo and Piper bond over their two sons.  Chris finally cracks and opens up to his father.**

**Spoilers:  "****Spin****City****"**

**Author's Note:  Thank you all for the feedback and encouragement, and please continue to review.**

~*~

            "Sunny-side-up or scrambled?" Phoebe asked, enveloped in an apron and dangerously brandishing a spatula.

            "Uh…scrambled," Piper answered, trying, but failing, to suppress a laugh.

            "What?" Pheobe questioned indignantly.

            "Well…it's just _you_ cooking for _me_."

            "I can cook, you know!"

            "I know you can.  And I'm sure those eggs will turn out great if you can prevent them from burning."

            Phoebe spun back around and quickly scraped the eggs into a plate.  She set the plate in front of Piper.  "They're a little brown but a little salt and pepper should do the trick," she said, sprinkling on the seasonings.

            Rolling her eyes, Piper stuck a fork into her eggs and took a bite.  "They are great."

            "Well, probably not great…but I just wanted to make this day a little easier on you," Phoebe replied, twirling the spatula.

            "Phoebe, I'm just going to be at the Magic School; it's just an orb away."  Piper ceased eating and looked up at her sister.

            "I know, but it'll be different here without you," Phoebe said.  

            "We've been apart before.  You went of to Hong Kong to be with Jason, and Paige moved in with Richard," Piper replied.

            "And see how wrong that turned out."

            "Well, it's just going to be for a couple of months, until the baby is born," Piper reassured.

            Phoebe turned back around and began to crack several more eggs.  "It's going to be great to see Chris, isn't it?"  She said excitedly.

            "We've already seen him.  In fact we see him every day," Piper said sardonically.

            Turning to face Piper, Phoebe implored, "Couldn't you be a little more excited?  You're having a baby!"  She squealed again at her last statement.

            Piper set down her fork, once again and gave Phoebe a look, trying to settle her down.  "Well, it's different this time.  It was an accident.  I mean I don't regret it, I don't regret it at all," she hastily added, then continued, "but this thing with Leo is really undefined, and Chris is…well, Chris.   And Wyatt isn't even two, yet.  How am I going to handle all of this?  I don't even know if Leo is going to be around."  Piper couldn't seem to stop; she let her thought's flow out to her younger sister.  She had tried to repress these feelings, had tried to stay strong, knowing that she would have to raise two children alone.  But now everything was up in the air.  Leo was attempting to spend more time with his family.  But, then again, would he succeed with the Elders?  She didn't know what to expect anymore….

            "Oh, honey."  Phoebe embraced Piper, telling her, "We'll always he here for you.  You know that, right?"  She let go, and added, "And, you know Leo wants to be here too.  He does love you, we can all see that."

            "I know that," Piper said.  "He, uh, he is actually trying to be here more."  At Phoebe's questioning eyes, Piper explained, "I don't know what he's going to say to the Elders, but he feels guilty for leaving Wyatt.  And now with Chris…he completely resents him.  For leaving him.  And Leo doesn't want that to happen, so he's trying to 'cut back his hours.'"  

            "Well, that's great!  I mean, Paige and I were just telling Chris how much we were missing Leo.  And Wyatt will be so happy."

            "Yeah, I know," Piper answered, smiling at the thought.  "But I just don't see how he can.  These are the Elders we're talking about."

            "He'll figure something out.  He did when you guys got married and had Wyatt--"

            "Speaking of Wyatt…here he is!"  Paige made a dramatic entrance into the kitchen, Wyatt in her arms.

            Dropping the spatula, Phoebe rushed over to them.  She relieved Paige of Wyatt and held him tightly, showering him with kisses.  "How's my little nephew.  I'm going to miss you soo much."

            Piper pushed her chair back, ready to rinse her plate, but was prevented by Paige.    "No, let me get it."

            Sighing, Piper handed her plate to Paige.  "You are ridiculous.  Both of you and especially you," she directed at Phoebe, still smothering Wyatt, who was squirming in her arms.

            "Oh, baby, are you gonna miss me?  Huh? Your Aunt Phoebe?"  Phoebe cooed at her nephew.

            Piper motioned to the pair, questioning Paige.

            "Well, we are going to miss you, having to hold down the fort on our own--" Paige offered, an excuse for their lavish attention being paid upon Piper and her child.

            "Paige!  You are an orb away," Piper repeated to the youngest.  "And especially you--_you_ can any time you want."

            "Yeah, you're right, but you know Phoebe," she said gesturing toward her.  "Just take the treatment happily for a change."  Grabbing a piece of toast, she sat down across from Piper.

            Piper rolled her eyes as she told Phoebe, who was blowing raspberries on a cackling Wyatt, "Get a grip."

            Shooting a hurt look at her sister, Phoebe replied, "He likes it."

            "Yeah, well, give him back to him mother.  He needs his breakfast."

            "Well, I can feed him.  You'll get to be with him all the time.  Anyway, you just take it easy."

            Chuckling slightly, Piper realized she was trying in vain to show Phoebe the absurdity of her actions and remained silent, pouring herself some orange juice.

            "So, is Chris doing alright?" Paige asked Piper, unsure whether to bring up this topic with Piper or not.  She still felt that Phoebe was the one that talked to Piper about her emotions and issues, and not because she was the Empath, but due to her tighter bond with Piper.

            "Uh, yeah, I guess…why?"  Piper replied, confused.

            "Oh.  Leo didn't talk to you?"

            "No, why?"  Piper repeated, impatiently this time.  Phoebe looked up from her feeding of Wyatt, taking on a greater interest in the conversation.

            "Well, I don't know.  It's just when I came home from P3 around one, I saw Leo and Chris in the living room.  And they seemed a little, uh…distraught," Paige explained hesitantly, unknowing to whether she should discuss this with her sisters.  Leo obviously hadn't brought it up; maybe he wanted them to remain oblivious.

            "I didn't realize Leo was awake then.  I was pretty sure that he fell asleep as I did," Piper pondered.

            "Wyatt was with him so maybe he woke Leo up," Paige said.

            "Well, he was asleep all afternoon.  He probably got a little case of insomnia," Phoebe supplied.

            "Anyway, that's not the point.  Do you know what happened between them?"  Piper asked.  At Paige's sign of unknowing, she added, "Leo was worried about Chris, last night.  He wanted to change things between them for the positive.  He wouldn't provoke Chris, would he?"

            "I don't know if they were arguing or not, all I can say is that they seemed distraught.  When Chris saw me he began to orb out, and Leo went back upstairs without mentioning it.  I don't know…maybe Phoebe should have been here, she can read emotions a lot better than I can."

            "Well, I was with Mitch.  And this Mitch was particularly cute, might I add," Phoebe said in her defense.

            "I hope they are okay.  I haven't seen them since last night.  Leo was gone before I woke up.  To Magic School, I presume.  And Chris, I just haven't seen," Piper stated, still focused on Chris and slightly worried.

            "I wouldn't worry about it, sweetie.  You know how those men can be."  Phoebe tried to reassure Piper in her delicate state.

            "Well, Chris is barely a man…."  Piper mused, not sure what she wanted to insinuate, as she swirled her finger around the top of her glass.

            Paige glanced at Phoebe and shrugged, and turned back to her toast.  Feeling as if her attempt to set Piper at ease didn't quite work out as intended, she diverted the topic away.  "So, what's Leo still doing over there?"

            "He's just trying to set up the specifics; that's what we discussed last night," she answered, not looking up from her orange juice.  "Where is Chris anyway?  He should be here by now, continuing his quest for demons or something.  Maybe I should call him."  And without waiting for the opposition that she knew was coming, she called out, "Chris!!"

            Phoebe scoffed as she cleaned Wyatt's face.  "Piper, take it easy.  _You_ don't need worry about him."

            "I'm fine, Phoebe."

            "Yeah, but-"

            At that moment, Chris, rubbing his eyes groggily, orbed into the kitchen to preventing further bickering.  "Yeah?" he asked in response to the call.

            "I'm just wondering where you've been?" Piper questioned her son.

            Chris, glancing at the clock above the stove answered, "It's not that late…"

            "Well, for you, it's pretty late."

            Chris just shrugged.

            At the silence that followed, Paige offered Chris the option of breakfast.  He shrugged once again in indifference, but sat down at the table.

            "So, I'm going to spend the next couple of weeks at the Magic School.  Leo felt that it would be safer there.  Just thought we'd let you know," Piper told her son, not only to give him information, but to draw some conversation out of him.

            "Oh, okay.  That's probably a good idea," Chris replied, nodding his head.

            Realizing she wasn't getting anywhere, Piper tried a different tactic.  "Agreeing with Leo…wow."

            "Well, he is right about this," he simply said.

            Paige set the plate in front of Chris and mumbled, "I'll get the bags from your room, Piper."  She did not want to get involved, still afraid she had leaked some information she shouldn't have.  Then, at Piper's nod, she orbed out.  Piper looked pointedly at Phoebe.  Phoebe got the message and said, "You haven't packed Wyatt's bags, have you?  Well let's go check, Wyatt."  She walked out the kitchen and upstairs, carrying the child.

            "What's up?" Chris asked, knowing exactly what was up.  He did not really want to talk about last night, though, not even with his mother.  Not yet, anyway.  He barely understood what had happened; last night he had pushed the thoughts of out of his mind as he went to bed, afraid of the alien emotions that they would extract.  So now with his mother, he couldn't explain the events, for he hadn't had a chance to really examine them.  He decided he would try to brush it off for now.  And as expected, Piper put forth the question, almost verbatim as he had imagined it.

            "What happened with Leo?  Paige told me she came home and saw you guys talking."

            "Yeah, we talked."

            "About?"

            "Nothing really."

            "Come on, Chris," she prodded.

            "We just came to an understanding, I guess," he stated, attempting to inject the words with a finalizing tone.

            "Alright," Piper said, understanding he wasn't ready.

            "Well, then.  Thanks for breakfast."  Chris stood up and placed the plate in the sink.  He turned back to Piper.  "Do you need anything, mom?  I can orb you and Wyatt to the Magic School, if you want."

            Piper smiled at the care etched on his facing.  "No, Leo is going to come back here when it's ready over there."  She paused, and then included, "You can go upstairs to the attic if you want to avoid Leo.  I'll tell him you're demon hunting as usual."

            Knowing she was trying to make some sort of point, Chris rolled his eyes, somewhat good-naturedly though.  He, then, walked to his mother and embraced her, leaning down to kiss her cheek.

            After he pulled away, Piper asked, chuckling, "What was that for?"

            Chris shrugged, slightly embarrassed. "Uh…you're going off to Magic School." Chris relayed the first excuse to come into his head.

            Then after a beat, Piper decided to play along, "Well, you're as bad as Phoebe.  Go back to work.  Now, off to the attic."  A smile played at her lips; she understood there was a hidden meaning to his action.

            As he did orbed out, Paige materialized in front of Piper, the bags at her sides.

            Seeing her, Piper stood up and said to her younger sister, "Thank you, Paige.  And, I'm tired of just waiting, so I'm going to call Leo, now," and she proceeded to do just that.

            Leo came as soon as he was called.  "Hey..." he said with some concern in his voice.  "Are you okay?"

            "Yeah, I'm fine.  I just want to get there.  They are driving me crazy here," she answered.

            "Hey!" Paige interjected indignantly.

            Leo smiled at the exchange.  He felt this cheerfully pleasant air in the room, and it was refreshing.  "Well, I can orb you over there and let you can get acquainted, and then I can take Wyatt over along with the bags," Leo offered, toward Piper.

            "Uh, yeah.  Okay.  But let me say bye to Phoebe, first.  She'll be a wreck if she doesn't get to see me off," she replied.  "Phoebe!"

            Hearing her name in Piper's voice, she rushed downstairs.  "Yeah?"

            "Well, I'm off for Magic School," she said a little dramatically, knowing it would, in turn, provoke a dramatic action out of Phoebe.

            "Oh, I'm going to miss you so much," she said tightly hugging her sister.  "Do you have to take Wyatt now?  He's in his crib."  She asked this as she stepped back from Piper.

            "No. Leo said he'd come back for him after he drops me off," Piper responded.

            "We'll miss you," Phoebe said, embracing Piper, though not quite as flamboyantly as Phoebe.

            "Don't worry guys. I'm just an orb away."  Piper did her best to reassure them.

            "Ready?" Leo asked.  At her nod, he took Piper's hand and orbed out.  As they dissolved, Phoebe flopped into a chair, looking dazed.

            Glancing her way, Paige said, "Phoebe, get a grip would you.  Piper's right; she is only an orb away."

            "Yeah, I know, but…"

            "Well, I'll go get Wyatt for Leo."  She orbed upstairs and within minutes was in the kitchen holding her now, awaken nephew.  Just as she did, Leo orbed in.  Phoebe sighed, seeing him, and Paige handed his son to him.

            "Can I talk to you guys for a second, before I go," he said, taking Wyatt into his arms.

            "Yeah, sure," Phoebe replied.

            "If you need Piper, call me first, alright?  She needs her rest, without any stress.  So, just call me first."

            "Okay.  So you're not going back up with the Elders?"

            "Uh, no, not right now at least.  I don't know about later, though.  It's so tough with those Elders….Well, anyway, I should get going."

            "Bye, Leo," Phoebe said, a little misty.

            Leo laughed, gathered the bags, and orbed out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  PG-13**

**Summary:  Leo disengages himself from the Elders.  Chris opens up to his aunts.  Leo and Piper bond over their two sons.  Chris finally cracks and opens up to his father.  Piper plans to go off to ****Magic****School**** until the birth of their child.**

**Spoilers:  "****Spin****City****"**

**Author's Note:  Thank you all for the feedback and encouragement, and please continue to review.  Remember, feedback is an author's inspiration. And it only takes a minute of your time.**  
  


~*~

            On his twin size bed, much too small for him, with his shoes still on, Chris lay, staring up at the black ceiling, occasionally lit up by the passing cars.  Downstairs he could hear the muffled sounds of the band Paige had booked.  These distractions, however, were not the cause of his insomnia.

            One of the diversions was the dreams haunting his nights.  But there was nothing he could do about them so he settled with simply suppressing them.  They, however, seemed to increase in intensity each night.

            However, this wasn't the only thing keeping him awake tonight.  His conversation with his mother still lay prominent in his mind.  He knew that she had backed down that morning, but he would eventually have to talk to her.  She wouldn't let him wallow in his sorrow for long.  But first, he, himself, had to decipher what he was feeling.

            Leo had managed to break through the wall Chris had built.  It was apparent that everything Leo had said was truly sincere.  And at that moment, that was enough for Chris.  He had been shown this concern by his father that in his childhood he never had received, and he had cracked.  But he just couldn't forget his childhood.

            Closing his eyes, Chris felt as if he was being pulled back in time as he saw a most miserable memory develop.  The scene played back in his head, the details fresh.  He visualized his fourteen-year-old self in great vividness, as he relived the past.

~*~

_            Chris loosened his tie and pressed his hand on the door to push it forward.  However, he was stopped by his grandfather's voice emitting from the following room._

_            "So, you're just going to leave, again?"  There was a tone of anger in his voice, and immediately Chris knew who he was addressing._

_            "It's not like I want to leave.  I have to go!"  Chris' assumption was proven correct by his father's reply._

_            "Right, you have to go…" his grandfather challenged.  "Because you job is more important than your own son."_

_            "You, of all people, have no right to talk to me like that!  Where were you for your family?" Leo shot back.  A paused followed, for it seemed Victor had no answer for this.  But Chris knew that he was more of a father to him than Leo ever was.  _

_            Then, cutting into Chris' thoughts, Leo added, "And this is for my family.  The Elders are calling me for Wyatt.  My son is dangerous and needs help, and I am doing everything in my power to stop him and help him."_

_            "You have another son right here you needs you right now."_

_            "Chris can fend off for himself.  Wyatt needs me more."  
  
_

_            "Can you be so blind?  Wyatt is the reason Chris has to 'fend off for himself.'  Look, I care about Wyatt too, but I also care about Chris.  And whether or not you care to admit it to yourself, he needs you."_

_            "I know how he feels….  Living through a day like this brings so much pain to me.  But we have so many responsibilities we have to attend to.  And Chris knows how important it is we take care of them" Leo replied, his voice wavered, but he steadied himself._

_            "Somehow, I have my doubts that you're actually hurt," Victor said softly._

_            "How can you say that!? I love Piper with all of my heart."  The anguish was so obvious in his voice that Chris had to acknowledge the truth of his words.  He wasn't going to question his father's love for his mother.  His grandfather realized the same._

_            "Look, I didn't mean that.  But this isn't about her right now.  _Chris needs you._  How many times do I have to repeat that?  Take a day out of your life of Wyatt for Chris," Victor said._

_            "I can't--" Leo began, but was cut short._

_            Chris heard a jingle and he could hear his father through the door, "I have to go now.  Could you tell Chris for me?"_

_            "No!" Victor answered, disgusted.  "I am not doing your dirty work for you."_

_            To stop the vicious bickering, Chris pushed the door open and entered.  "Hey, Dad."_

_            "Chris?" Leo answered, shock in his voice.  "How long where you there?"_

_            "Long enough," he answered, trying to keep the bitterness down to a minimum.  "Look, I understand you have to go."_

_            "You do?" Leo questioned._

_            "Yeah, go ahead.  Wyatt needs you."  Chris forced a weak smile.  Why was he playing this game, again?  He wanted desperately to lash out at his father.  Leo had shattered his hopes; he had broken his promise once again.  His grandfather was right: he did need his father now, but there was nothing he could do.  He wasn't going to beg or plead or argue, not today.  He couldn't today.  "Just go," Chris said with a wave of his hand._

_            "You understand, of course, that this is for Wyatt."  Leo tried to make him understand, but somehow Chris couldn't help but resent his older brother with an even greater passion for ruining his family._

_            But he simply replied, "Of course."_

_            "You'll be okay."  It was more of a statement than a question.  It was if he didn't want to deal with his son's problems, yet he felt obligated to ask about his wellbeing._

_            "Yeah," Chris answered with a nod.  'I've been okay every other time you've left me,' he thought but prevented himself from adding._

_            Leo put out his arm and clasped his son's shoulder.  "I knew you would understand.  I'll be down later."  Then, he orbed out._

_            "Yeah right," Chris answered disbelievingly.  "That's what you always said, but you were never here."_

_            "Chris?" his grandfather, who had been silent during the entire conversation, said questioningly._

_            "You know, I don't need him now," Chris said, thrusting his tie onto the couch.._

_            "Hey, Chris, I know you are angry-" Victor tried to interject._

_            "I'm not angry.  I'm used to this.  I don't need him!  I've never needed him, and I never will," Chris shouted, continuing his rant.  "He was never here and I got along fine.  I learned how to play the guitar on my own, got through my first date, warded off my first demon.  All on my own.  And all these things a son's supposed to do with his father."  He stopped and reflected," You know, I'm supposed to be the son of this great witch and some powerful angel.  Well, I don't feel like a son at all.  I'm nothing compared to the firstborn Wyatt. Well, just look what your precious son just did, Dad.  He killed my mother and your wife. "_

_            "Chris…"  Victor said, trying to pacify his grandson._

_            Chris looked into his grandfather's eyes.  His voice broke as he questioned, "What am I supposed to do without her, Grandpa.  She's all I've ever had.  And Dad…I thought he'd be here for me, now that I really need him."_

_            Victor stood silent, realizing he was unable to verbally soothe Chris, for his own hatred toward his son-in-law ran too deep._

_            "He has been obsessed with Wyatt ever since I was born.  And I know he was always there for Mom if she really needed him."  There was a distinct hiatus, as Chris tried to control his feelings.  But he was an emotional train wreck.  His mother had died today, and his father had rejected him once again.  Chris couldn't stop himself as he said through his now-falling tears, "He's been there for them, but why doesn't he want me?"_

_            Victor wasn't ready for this question, but he was willing to give Chris the reassurance he desperately needed._

_            Chris stood with his head in his hand, his shoulders shaking.  He, then, felt a set of arms wrap around him and took solace in his grandfather, sobbing on his shoulder._

~*~

            "God, why am I so weak," he said aloud to himself.  But then, as he reasoned, he realized that day had been quite emotional.  In fact, he would probably name it as the worst day in his life.  He was barely a teenager and had seen his world come to pieces.

            Chris hadn't seen his mother again for about eight years, but she was then placed in front of him every day.  But he couldn't enjoy the pleasures of a mother's love, for she didn't know his identity.  He didn't understand how he had kept himself in check the first time he had seen his family.  But he had been on a mission, to save his family back home.  The thought of his past life had motivated him to stay on track.

            And that would have to motivate him now.  Saving Wyatt was a priority.  He could not let his relationship with his father affect his primary goal.

            But what nagged him was how he couldn't control himself last night.  He had had an excuse for cracking during his mother's funeral; he was only a kid and was devastated.  It was understandable, expected even.  But not now.  He had contained himself when he met his mother for the first time in years, but he hadn't been able to do the same with his father.

            He was scarred for life by his father's past actions, but now Leo's genuineness had shockingly soothed his wounds.  But could he just forget the past?  He couldn't just wash away his father's previous actions as if nothing had happened.

            Last night had been a mistake.  He had let his guard down and look what had happened.  He had worked his entire life to build a wall around himself, which would protect him, and in one night it was destroyed.  

            Was it fair to Leo, though, that he was going to block him off?  Chris had opened up to his mother, but was planning on denying his father.  But the difference was he already had a strong relationship with Piper.  There was nothing like that with Leo.  He would have to start over.  And not only would he have to start from scratch, but attempt to wash away the past pains.

            And so what if Leo would be hurt.  He had hurt him a countless number of times.  If he wanted a good relationship with his son, he would have to start with the baby.  Chris wasn't here to fix a relationship; he was here to save the world.  And seeing his mother was just an added benefit, but Leo was something he just had to deal with.

            He had combed through his head and decided that last night was, indeed, a slip.  He couldn't just pretend the past had never happened.  And his sole purpose here was to protect Wyatt, nothing more.

            Chris closed his eyes, attempting to now getting to sleep, believing his mind was clear.  But in the back of his head, he knew the truth.  The past wasn't _this_ Leo's fault; he hadn't done anything yet.  And deep in his heart, he truly did want the love of a father; that was evident in last night's actions, and in his conversation with Phoebe and Paige.

            However, he ignored the truth.  It was in his nature to block out the emotions he couldn't sort through and shut out the people with whom overly complex relationships were involved.

            Because of these prevalent thoughts, Chris knew he wasn't going to get to sleep.  He decided to go back to the house and get something to eat in an attempt to avoid those few feelings burrowed in his head.

            "I've got to stick to the plan," he orally thought as he orbed out.


	6. Chapter 6

**Title:  Deeper Into the Light**

**Author:  sbender333 (sbender333@yahoo.com)**

**Rating:  PG-13**

**Summary:  Leo disengages himself from the Elders.  Chris opens up to his aunts.  Leo and Piper bond over their two sons.  Chris finally cracks and opens up to his father.  Piper plans to go off to ****Magic****School**** until the birth of their child.  Chris reminisces about the past and his anger at Leo rises once again.**

**Spoilers:  "****Spin****City****"**

**Author's Note:  My god, it has been a while, but I got slammed.  I do however, have the next part written and I will get that up this weekend, because I want to let this one soak a bit.  Ah, and this installment is another transitional chapter to meld it into the events of "Spin City", but it's filled with a lot of conflicted and confusing emotions of who else, but Piper and Leo.  So read on and review. And to those who have already done so, thanks so much for the feedback, guys; I appreciate it so much.  Feedback is an author's inspiration.  You've already done the hard part by reading it, so just leave a minute-long message and tell me what you think because it means a lot.**  
  


~*~

            Leo orbed in with Wyatt in his arms, the bags at his sides.  He glanced around the entrance hall and saw Piper waiting.

            "Already check out your room?" he asked her with a smile.

            "No.  You were gone for a five minutes max and I couldn't find anyone to carry my bags," she answered.  "So, I think you're just going to have to carry them for me."

            "Ah, how much stuff does this little kid need?" Leo bantered playfully, glancing down at his son.

            "I didn't pack it.  Phoebe offered to"

            "Well, that explains it."  Leo said this, looking backing up at Piper.  She held his gaze, allowing for a moment of silence to fill the high cathedral ceilings.

            "So…maybe we really should put up the bags," she said, the silence now becoming stifling.  "I want to see my room—the one I'll be spending three months in."  

            Leo was shaken out of his daze, for he had once again gotten lost in Piper's face.  He sighed and tried to regain his train of thought.  "Piper..." he started, know convincing her wouldn't be easy.  He decided to try a different tactic instead of simply flat out telling her.  "Let me show you something," he said, turning her to face the hallway leading toward the classrooms.

            "We can't just leave the bags…" she stated, a little befuddled by Leo's actions.

            "Ah, don't worry about it.  No one's going to take a couple of bags, Piper.  Besides, we have to go.  Afternoon classes are almost over."  Leo replied, knowing the reaction his last statement would provoke.

            "What do you mean 'afternoon classes'?" she asked threateningly.

            "Piper, let me just show you," Leo responded.

            "Whatever," she said in resignation.  They walked down the hall as Piper looked back, unconvinced, at the bags lying in their lonesome at the center of the hall.

~*~

            "Leo…"  Piper stared through the class window, looking at the toddlers levitating objects, telekinetically spinning tops, and orbing balls to each other.  "I don't think so-"

            "I really think this is a good idea.  I talked to Gideon about it this morning, and he agreed wholeheartedly."  Leo was trying desperately to reason with her, understanding it would take a lot to get Piper to do this.  "Wyatt is really, really powerful; you know that."

            "Of course I know that.  He conjured a dragon at the age of one.  Chris has told us of what he apparently does," Piper retorted, feeling a little defensive and as if Leo was patronizing her about her son's abilities.

            "Piper, I know you know, so you should know the good this school can do.  It could help Wyatt channel his powers for good, help him control them, let him live without worry and be with witches his own age…the benefits are _countless_, Piper."  Leo turned to face Piper, looking into her eyes.

            "I don't know…"  Piper realized the truth of Leo's words but something was keeping her from acting:  mother's intuition maybe.  Or maybe she just wanted Wyatt to have the most normal life she could provide.  She looked up at Leo and saw him waiting patiently.  Her eyes then shifted to Wyatt and fingered a lock of his blonde hair.  It was getting a little long; maybe she should get it cut—non-magically, like a normal child.

            "I just want him to have a normal childhood," she said without taking her eyes of Wyatt.  She verbalized one of her great fears to Leo, as tears slid down her cheek.  'Damn hormones,' she thought, now having the luxury of blaming her emotions on the pregnancy.

            "But he's not normal," Leo said soothingly.  He wiped a tear of her face with his thumb, furthering the degree of comfort he offered.

            "I know…I know you're right," she sighed.  "It's just…"

            "I know," Leo assured.  Piper met his gaze once again.  God, how much she missed this, having a husband to whom she didn't need to explain her every thought.

            Breaking into Piper's muse, Leo gently said, "Hey, let's see if you can talk to one of the teachers.  Maybe she can ease some worry."

            Piper nodded and allowed herself to be led into the classroom by Leo.  There, as she continued to observe the children with whom her son would spend his time, Leo spoke with a woman.

            "Hey," Leo said, diverting her observations off the children.  "This is one of the nursery teachers.  I'll let her talk to you and Wyatt, and she can show you guys around."  Leo handed the child over to the woman.

            "You aren't going to stay?" Piper asked.

            "No, I can't…I have to get back to the Elders," Leo replied, not wanting to elaborate.  He had promised Piper in a moment of passion and desperation something he hadn't thought through thoroughly.  He had attempted to talk to Gideon this morning about spending more time at home, but he had backed out, remember the what had happened when he had tried that before.  And he just didn't know how to tell Piper that he had made such a false promise.  And he didn't even want to think about how this would go over with the Elders Up There.

            "Right," Piper said as Leo orbed out.  He was gon1e….  How could she have kidded herself!  She had let herself get caught up in her emotions, but her initial thoughts had been right.  Keeping in touch with the reality that Leo was probably not going to get away from being an Elder should have been the way to go, but she had let both Phoebe's and Leo's assurances sway her.

            "Ms. Halliwell?  Would you like me to introduce you to the others?"

            Piper nodded as she was brought of her thoughts and walked in a trance-like state after the woman.

~*~

            Hours later, the duo emerged into the looming hall, Piper truly feeling much better after getting to know the staff.  She had received a tour and was able to participate in some activities with Wyatt.  The fact that she could keep an eye on her son because of her residing at Magic School aided in the pacification of some of her tension.  Also, she had learned that the children did indeed spend time in "normal" children's activities, such as snacking, napping, and even finger-painting.  Apparently art was an emotional outlet.

            "It wasn't that bad was it?" Piper heard a voice ask.  She looked up and saw a smiling Leo standing in front of her, leaning on the door opposite the class she had just departed.  "I just got here and saw you guys leaving so I thought I'd wait," he explained, picking up Wyatt of the ground.

            "Yeah, I guess.  And if it gets to bad I can always pull him out."  Piper replied to his original inquiry, lighthearted pessimism in her tone.

            Leo chuckled at this as they continued to walk toward the main hall.

            "Did you like it?"  Leo questioned Wyatt.  A smile on the boy's face seemed to answer.

            "So I heard you got to Chris…" Piper questioned, after a moment of silence had taken over.

            "What?  Oh, Chris…so you heard?"  At Piper's nod he went on, "Well, I think so.  I really hope so.  He was so angry that day, in the lair.  I don't think one night is going to wash it away.  But it's a start."

            "Yeah, that's great," Piper put forth enthusiastically.

            "Yeah, I hope so," he said, though with a hint of doubt.  "But you know how Chris is," Leo sighed.  Then as the bags came into view, Leo added, "See, they're still here, safe and sound."

            "Yeah, yeah; you were right," Piper said mockingly.  "But Leo-" She pulled his eyes to her and referring to Chris, she said, "Make sure you talk to him.  You'll get through to him."

            Leo nodded, and after a pause, as he put Wyatt on the floor, said, "Yeah, well I should go; we spent all day here," At this statement Piper lost all hope.  He really was going.  Had he just forgotten that conversation they had had merely a day ago?   Piper once again berated herself for holding onto that false glimmer of hope:  'You told yourself he couldn't possibly stay, but you didn't really believe it…now look how much it hurts.'  She diverted her eyes from Leo, glancing at the floor.

            She brought her eyes back up as she heard Leo say, "Ah, here's Sigmund."  Clad in robs, just as they always saw him, Sigmund strode in.  "Can you set these in Piper's room?"

            "Sure Leo," Sigmund flustered as he carried the first set down the hall.

            Pained to leave his son again, Leo bent down towards Wyatt's level saying his goodbyes.  "Hey, buddy.  Don't give Mommy such a hard time okay?  You got to eat all your vegetables and brush your teeth everyday.  Don't forget to play a lot," he crooned, stroking his son's hair.  Through the corner of his eye he saw Sigmund return.

            "Are these the last of them?" Sigmund inquired.

            "Yeah, thank you," Piper said gratefully, as Sigmund rolled the last batch out.

            Piper glanced down and witnessed Leo holding his son in a tight embrace.  How could she stay angry at a man who was so obviously hurt at leaving his son…even if he had promised her that he would stay?

            "You're suffocating the boy," she said to stop Leo, in part because her words might have had some truth to them and also because she wanted to see him leave as soon as possible, knowing he wouldn't be here in the future.  It hurt to the core.

            Leo released his son, who immediately returned to his mother, and rose at her words.  "It's just, you know…"

            "Overcompensating?"  Piper supplied.

            "No, I…I just...miss him a lot," Leo countered.

            Piper nodded, knowing that was the truth, no matter what Leo did, "I know."

            Leo changed tracks as he asked once again, "So, you sure you're going to be okay here?  I mean until the baby's born."

            "I haven't seen my room yet, but, yeah, I think so. Gideon's right -- I'll be safe here, and that's the most important thing, isn't it?" She replied.

            "Yeah, I think so," Leo said in response.

            "Besides I'm just an orb away if the girls need me," Piper added quickly.    She attempted to soothe some of her pain at realizing Leo would not be here by taking comfort in the fact that her sisters were an instant away.

            "No, I…already talked to them, they're supposed to call me first," he said tentatively.  He had firmly decided that afternoon in the clouds that he would stay on Earth until the baby was born, despite what the Elders said.  It was up in the air after that, but at least he was here now.

            Piper was shocked at the revelation but kept her composure, not wanting to let Leo know that she had doubted his word, so she simply said, "Yes we do."  After a beat she said, "Keep trying to get through to him, Leo.  Don't give up."  Taking a different route in their conversation, she managed to suppress her emotions.  Grateful to the fact that Leo had fought to stay, she added, "Remember, he's just as stubborn as you are."  She held his gaze for a minute and then to Wyatt said, "Come on, Pumpkin.  Wave 'goodbye' to Daddy."  She helped in this motion and then walked into a hall, leaving Leo staring at them.  

            As they walked off into the distance, Gideon approached Leo.

            "Take care of them, Gideon, will you?"  Leo asked, without taking his eyes off the rapidly disappearing figures.  He knew he and Piper really did need to talk about reality…but he couldn't bring himself to tell her how unlikely it would be to get their wish granted.  So much had changed in six months.

            "Absolutely," his mentor said, replying to Leo's request.  At his smile, Leo orbed out.


	7. Chapter 7

**Title: Deeper Into the Light**

**Author: sbender333 (sbender333yahoo.com)**

**Rating: PG-13**

**Summary: Leo disengages himself from the Elders. Chris opens up to his aunts. Leo and Piper bond over their two sons. Chris finally cracks and opens up to his father. Piper plans to go off to ****Magic****School**** until the birth of their child.**

**Spoilers: "****Spin****City****"**

**Author's Note: Alright, this one ties up the ****Spin****City**** scenes. The next one will around Witch Wars, more or less. And this chapter itself contains yet another flashback. I really like exploring Chris' past. Maybe, I'll add one layered into each chapter of the current time. Oh and thanks to ChrisOriented for inspiring the flashback. Check out the poem called "Fireflies at Night." And, the minute-long review: Haha, well that was meant more of as an "It won't take but a minute" but that's even better. Thank you all for the feedback and encouragement, and please continue to review. Remember, feedback is an author's inspiration. And it only takes a minute of your time.**

With solely the dim light of the refrigerator offering him a source of sight in the darkness of the kitchen, Chris stood at the counter making himself a sandwich. He slowly sliced a piece of bread off the loaf.

As his knife hit the cutting board, finishing the cutting of the slice, Chris saw orbs appear without looking up. Knowing it could only be one person, he sighed. He'd have to deal with this sooner than he had hoped.

"Hey," Leo greeted.

"Hey," Chris replied. Great—Leo he thought they were good terms now. 'Well why wouldn't he?' a voice in Chris' head challenged. 'You _cried_ on his shoulder!' Chris internally cringed in disgust at showing that kind of emotion at his father. His purpose here was to protect Wyatt. He reminded himself of this, once again.

"So…can't sleep?" Leo prodded.

Chris shook his head in response and sliced the second piece.

"Like father, like son," Leo considered.

Looking up abruptly, Chris questioned, "What?"

"Well, I tend to get a midnight snack if I have trouble sleeping."

Chris turned back to his sandwich and opened a jar of mayonnaise. He glanced around for a knife, and then realized Leo was holding it out to him.

Reaching for it, Chris muttered, "Thanks." He turned back to the sliced bread and slated mayo onto the sandwich. Through the corner of his eye, he could see his father studying him, waiting for some sort of comment. The silent treatment worked when he was a kid, and maybe it'd work now.

"Chris, what's wrong?" Leo asked, concerned.

Chris laid several slices of turkey on the bread.

"Come on, Chris. I thought we made a little headway last night. You can talk to me."

"No I can't! Okay?" Chris said frustrated, slamming pieces of the holey Swiss cheese on top of the turkey. "Look I'm only here to protect Wyatt. That's my purpose, my goal."

"But what about Piper!" Leo said in indignation. He didn't mean it as if he was competing against Chris' mother, but he just wanted to understand.

"That's different. It's so much easier…She's my mom," Chris replied, thinking about life without her the last eight years of his life.

"But I'm your dad…" Leo questioned quietly.

"No, you…" Chris started, but then looked down. God, this was so much harder then he had imagined. The man in front of him was trying, desperately trying to connect with his son. And one part of him wanted to soak in this attention and love, but his other side was suppressing him. It was too painful to deal with the past, and he would be hurt by this man again…. But, knowing Leo wasn't going to relent, Chris decided, looking him in the eye, that he had to give him some sort of reason.

"Look, I know you aren't the same person as my fath-" he began but then adamantly edited that to, "the Leo, of my time. You feel hurt that I'm not opening up or whatever-" his voice turned more somber as he continued, "but I can't just forget what happened to me in the past. Be a father to Wyatt and the Chris of your time." At this he slammed the final piece of bread onto his sandwhich and orbed out.

Sitting on the Golden Gate Bridge overlooking the city, he sighed in memory of his past life. Why did his plans always go awry? He really should have thought things through. But that was Bianca's job, and she was gone now. He closed his eyes at the pain he felt. That's what his entire life was: pain…but he was here to change that, wasn't he? Yes, but all he was here to change was Wyatt, nothing else.

Why was he sitting here and wallowing in his self pity? Because his happiest memory was riddled with such sorrow of an opportunity lost...

_ "Piper? Where are you guys." Leo asked, his head turning as he took a quick survey of the rooms._

_ "Daddy!" Leo heard the excited squeal of his six-year-old from the backyard, answering his question. "We're here. Come quick. We're catching fireflies!" Leo smiled at the eagerness, remembering his own childhood innocence of watching fireflies by night. He quickened his steps at his son's request but couldn't fail to notice the serenity that had blanket Halliwell Manor._

_ Upon reaching the kitchen a strong smell of grill smoke hit his nose, and as he walked on he saw the late-twilight sky through the open door._

_ Catching sight of Leo, his son opened his cupped hands, releasing a firefly into the air. It lit up as it rose higher into the sky, indicating the hundreds of others that were luminously blinking on and off against the evening sky._

_ "Daddy! I'm so glad you're home." The pattering of footsteps clued him into his son dashing toward him. He knelt down on the patio in time to catch his son, who collided into his chest and buried his head onto his father's shoulder. Leo embraced his son, as he breathed in his boyish scent, and kissed his head, trying to counteract the length of time he had been gone._

_ After separating, Leo looked in the green eyes, filled with such hope and delight at seeing his father finally home, compelling Leo to kiss his forehead once again. Instead of squirming away like he usually did, the boy took the kiss without complaint._

_ Finally breaking the trance, his son eagerly asked, "Do you want to see the cool plane Mommy got me for my birthday? It's got a remote control and everything. I can go get it." He attempted to pull out of his father's embrace to retrieve his gift._

_ Leo held him back and laughed. "No, it's alright, buddy. You can show me later. You can go back to your firefly-catching," he said running a hand through his hair._

_ After contemplating it for a few seconds, he agreed, "Okay. But will you come and play with us?"_

_ "Sure, but let me talk to your mother first." Leo rose as he watched his son scamper of into the dark to meet his brother. He turned his head to the side and saw Piper sitting on the bench watching her children._

_ Walking toward the bench, he asked, "So, he's forgiven me?"_

_ "Well, he's only six. When they're that young, they don't hold grudges," she answered without looking up._

_ Leo ran his hand over the back of the garden bench in the silence. Finally, in an attempt to break the tension, he asked, "Where is everyone?"_

_ "Out," she responded simply. Leo sighed palpably at her monosyllabic answer._

_ Piper, feeling bad, turned her head to look at Leo. "There's some food left over for you on the grill."_

_ Without moving, he said, his voice soft, "You saved some for me."_

_ "Well, you said you were coming home today."_

_ "I said a lot of things," Leo answered, barely audible. At this, he turned and headed toward the grill. Lifting up the top, he saw its contents and asked, "Wyatt's favorite…you still couldn't get through to him, could you?"_

_ Piper shook her head and finally seemed to crack. "I don't know what to do, Leo. He's so distant."_

_ Setting his plate down, Leo returned to the bench and sat down next to Piper, wrapping his arms around her._

_ "It's not your fault.... I should be around so much more," he sighed_

_ "You have obligations."_

_ "But family comes first," he immediately retorted. Then, looking into the yard, watching his boys play, Leo observed, "He seems to be having fun now."_

_ "Yeah, he definitely adores the attention of his little brother. No doubt about that," Piper said, with a small smile._

_ "How's school?" Leo questioned, trying to get back into the boys' life._

_ "Chris is his usual shy self in school. I hope he gets over that…. But I don't know about Wyatt. I had a conference with his teacher a couple of days ago."_

_ "Why? What happened?"_

_ "Just a number of childhood tussles, but still—"_

_ "I'm sure it's fine, Piper. He just needs someone else to be here, and I promise I'll do a better job of that," Leo reassured her as Piper closed her eyes against his chest._

_ "Hey, Daddy, look what Wyatt caught," Chris called out running toward the bench. Leo pulled him up as he struggled to climb onto it, and set him in his mother's lap. Wyatt followed, much more slowly, holding a jar containing several fireflies._

_ "Hey, slugger," Leo greeted his older son warmly._

_ "Dad," he acknowledged, his eyes still fixed on the jar._

_ "Look how they light up Wyatt's hands. Can I hold it?" Chris asked his brother, gesturing toward the jar._

_ Nodding, Wyatt handed it over._

_ As Chris looked, transfixed into the jar, Piper chimed in, "You know, guys, these fireflies won't be able to survive in here."_

_ "Why not?" Chris asked, confusion clouding his eyes._

_ "It's not their home; they'll be without food and their family, and they might die," Piper gently informed him._

_ "Oh…" Disappointment fell over Chris, but he made his decision. "We should let them go, Wyatt," he stated._

_ "But they are so cool. I like them in the jar," Wyatt retorted._

_ "But Mommy says they'll die," Chris reasoned innocently with his brother._

_ "Yeah, and if you let them go, they'll can share their light with other people," Piper added._

_ "C'mon, Wyatt," Chris pleaded._

_ "Oh, alright," Wyatt answered, taking the jar from his brother's hands. He didn't want Chris to beg so he unscrewed the lid, allowing the fireflies to escape. Chris sighed, but contently, and reclined back against his mother, who wrapped her arms around him._

_ "Sit down, Wyatt," Piper said tenderly, making room between her and Leo. He did so and laid his head down on the back of the bench looking up at the now dark sky._

_ Suddenly he rose and reached his arms out towards a firefly, slapping it in between his hands. Turning toward his family, he opened his hands and showed the streak of bright yellow to his younger brother._

_ "Look at that, Chris," he said, delight in his eyes. "Isn't that cool?"_

_ "You killed it!" Chris answered softly, shocked._

_ "But it's fun."_

_But it's fun...it's fun…fun.... _The words of his brother echoed back to him. If only he had known.

"Fun" he repeated in disgust. He shook himself out of his daze as he saw orbs appear, but prevented himself from acknowledging him. Why couldn't he just leave him alone?

"Can we talk?" Leo asked.

"There's nothing to talk about," Chris replied curtly. Hadn't he said enough inside?

"There seems to be a lot to talk about," Leo prodded him, desperate for more info, desperate to find out why he could never be forgiven.

"It doesn't matter."

"It does to me! Like it or not, you are my son," Leo said. Yeah, that was true, and it never was going to change. Chris looked aside at this thought. "Please, I deserve to know. What did I do that was so bad?"

"You weren't there for me. You were there for everyone else—Mom, Wyatt, half the world it seems." Chris looked back at Leo and, pronouncing every syllable, laid out, "But you weren't there for me. You didn't have the time."

Leo, stopped, shocked, but then suggested, "Maybe...you didn't come back just to try to save your brother. Maybe you came back to try to save us, too."

No. It hurt too much, and he would only be hurt again. "I doubt it." And he orbed out once again, leaving his father alone.


End file.
